A tough week it has been

This week...kids have been sick, baby is teething BAD, I haven't had much sleep and now I am sick. I feel I have reached my breaking point several times this week...I have cried for no apparent reason...things have come across my mind that have burdened my heart with aches and pains but God's grace is enough to see me through. I have cleaned like crazy, only to have a mess follow right behind me, and I have been trying to pick out the perfect gifts for everyone which has me mentally exhausted. When I have reached the point of flooding tears...I have just held them back...until today...I let those tears fall like drops of rain and I am ashamed that I didn't turn to prayer this morning, instead I let anger take over my tears and turn into complete aggravation. This isn't what is suppose to happen....I am suppose to rely on God at all times..he is my rock. I hit a block, an emotional road block that seeped up into my heart and into my throat and out poured tears.. with my heart. It isn't one particular thing that has my heart aching...it's a million different things that I can't even explain. I am a very sensitive person, sensitive to hurtful words, sensitive to that homeless person out in the snow while we are warm and cozy in our homes, sensitive to the children in orphanages who haven't been taken in and feel abandoned, sensitive to people in need and to my friends and family who go through hard times. I feel overwhelmed lately, I feel useless in all of these areas, but so desperately want to just DO SOMETHING!! I feel God is definately putting orphans on my heart lately...I feel he is saying..just take the first step and I will guide you through the rest. I feel this is my calling. My LOVE for children and their heartache, but I just don't know what I can do for them..I don't know what I have to offer...Not that I am questioning God or his plan but just the fact that ...I want to know the full plan!! I am a nosey person, I have to know every full detail and I am a planner...I don't like surprises because I AM NOSEY! This has indeed been a struggling week for me for many reasons, but I will lay these burdens before God and seek his guidance because that's what I am suppose to do and more important only God knows all truth to all situations. He has a book that he has written and mapped out and he is using me in this book as part of his plan...So who am I to question him? He knows my next move before I make it, he and only he knows my heart and my intentions....So Lord I ask for your guidance in this!